Homestuck. Someone help me. = An introduction.


Heyo. So, if you took my advice from a few posts ago, then you’ve tried to read Homestuck. Obviously, not many of you have, due to the fact none have commented on said post about how crazy weird it is. Ok, fine. Don’t read it if you don’t want to. But the thing is, it’s amazing. I admit, it’s a bit boring at first, with all the normal stuff John does… but it gets better. The characters are just amazing. First there’s the kids.


Ok. First one’s Jade Harley. She’s pretty awesome and sleeps a lot at the beginning, and she kinda can predict the future. Second one’s Dave Strider. As you can see by the picture, he HATES puppets. His older brother loves them, though, so he can never escape from them. Dave raps a lot, swears on practically a 1:10 word ratio, and is really cool too, I guess. Third one’s John Egbert. The first kid in the narrative, he’s also the first one to enter the game. He loves movies, Nick Cage, and his father. He seems to be a central point in the story line, but that remains to be seen. Final kid here is Rose Lalonde. She’s awesome. She loves magic, (especially dark magic), knitting, and hates her booze-addicted mother to some extent, but somewhere in act 6 she starts to drink too… weird.

Next are the trolls. THE TROLLS ARE AWESOME. Since there’s like 12 of them, I’ll try to keep this bit short. No promises.


First up is Aradia. She’s dead, and has been, for approximately 99.9% of the storyline. Weird. Next is Equius, who sweats a lot and I’m pretty sure he’s at least 1% horse. Then there’s Eridian. He’s a complete jerkface. Enough said. The  there’s Feferi, who we don’t really see a lot of before she’s killed off by Eridan. (See? HE’S A SNOT-RAG). Gamzee is next. Oh, Gamzee. He drinks a lot and goes on rampages where he kills people too. He’s funny, but not because he kills people, that’s just stupid and sad. There’s Kanaya, who’s my favorite one, but I’m not exactly sure why… Then there’s Karkat. He seems to be a central point in the storyline, too, but he swears on practically a 1:2 word basis and he’s really strange. Then there’s Nepeta, who pretends to be a cat. There’s Sollux, who eats *the mind honey* and goes blind. There’s Tavros, who’s handicapped and then he isn’t and then he thinks he can fly, and it’s all very weird. There’s Terezi, who’s blind and hangs stuffed animals for treason, and tastes colors, and she’s just random. Finally, there’s Vriska. She’s the other *central* character, and she can manipulate people with her mind.

In act one, we get introduced to the main characters and everything is as normal as it gets. Then the kids get sucked into the game, one by one. Here’s an unnecessarily long summary of the first year of Homestuck, written by the guy who runs Homestuck, that nobody read and you don’t have to, either. On second thought, let me just give you the link to the site where you can experience Homestuck for yourselves. Just try it, at least!

Have fun, y’all!




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